Good.
First, I'm really getting fed up with how people seem to get off on power trips in their relationships. My friend was dumped by her boyfriend a couple months ago, only she hasn't been able to move on because he's dangling this string of false hope right in front of her. He actually showed up at her house crying, begging for her back. Only to change his mind again. Then a couple days ago he told her he wanted to be with her, but they had to hide it from his mother (whole other story). THEN last night he sends her a message saying he kissed another girl and realized he doesn't want to be with her. I told her, that's it, he's a jerk, move on.
But no.
She still loves him. However she was talking about meeting new guys so I guess that's progress. Dating is supposed to be fun, especially when you're young! In a perfect world, I'd date lots of guys who make me laugh and if it ends, it ends. Emotional attachment is such a bitch, especially when physical attraction is involved.
If you keep constantly breaking up and making up, you're relationship isn't healthy. If you're significant other likes to play mind games with you, you're relationship isn't healthy. If the person you've been dating doesn't want to be called your boyfriend or girlfriend, yet again, not healthy. I wonder if dating was ever simple or could ever be simple again.
Speaking of dating, today I saw two of my crushes from last year. One of them is recently single and the other could possibly be single now. Mr. Recently Single is adorable and expressed his sadness at not seeing me all the time this semester. Mr. Possibly Single seemed overly happy to have come across me in the dining hall, and even though I didn't notice him walk by, he threw his tray down and sat next to me. Mr. Possibly Single ALSO sent me drunk text messages during the night of an ice storm, saying "how are you holding up in the storm?" and "i love you". However when he sent those messages he was Mr. Taken, not Mr. Possibly Single. I know the name are dumb, but bear with me. I thought maybe Possibly Single had feelings for me so today I suggested we hang out soon and he show me his new house. He answered "yeah totally." It's a word he uses often, but a "yeah definitely, I'll call you soon" would have been more suggestive of his potential feelings for me. "Yeah totally" sounds more like "yeah, maybe if I remember and have nothing better to do."
As for Mr. Recently Single, his ex-girlfriend was skinny and he thought she was beautiful. He had this artsy looking picture of her as the background to his computer last year. She looked 5'3 and a 100 pounds. I'm 5'8'' and 160. It's not that I completely lack confidence because I don't. I see an extremely skinny girl and wonder how her sex life could ever be good with hips that small. I just don't feel in shape, because I'm not. Recently Single isn't drop dead gorgeous or anything, but if he's looking to date a toothpick he won't be looking at me. He'll see me as a friend. He probably already does.
I hope someone reads this and has some words of wisdom to bestow on me.
I don't have a quote for you yet, maybe later tonight I"ll find one.
Later,
- NC
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